Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Baruch Hashem, I'm home from Crown Heights. I'm so grateful to be back in my own space. I'm grateful to be home safely.
The trip was intense on so many levels, It was very emotive. Every time I turned around I saw a familiar face, another woman to hug. I keep thinking of the expression "ish echad v'lev echad" - "one man with one heart." This described the Yidden when they camped at Har Sinai before receiving the Torah. They were so physically and emotionally exhausted from their desert trekking, they had no strength left to fight. They could not fight with each other, they could not fight with G-d. They had to take whatever G-d laid on them. That's how this trip was for me. Right from the get-go I was zonked, and that made me receptive to a lot of experiences (both positive and negative). It made me "at one" with so many people and moments. I cried a lot.
I notice that being overtired is a little like being stoned. I lost some of my critical faculties, but I was very bubbly and verbal and open. I saw all the holy 770 freakazoids, the crazy Israeli ladies and the zealous tzedoka collectors. I saw friends everywhere. I got to spend an unexpected evening with the California Beauty Queen (who I'm guessing is in labor right now). I got to go to a mothers' support group. I got to see the black dude from Kingston pizza, his gold-tooth smile saying; "where you been?" I saw all the Israeli guests coming to Crown Heights for Tishrei. I ran up and down city blocks from morning 'til night.
I didn't accomplish everything on my "list," yet I accomplished more than I could have ever hoped. I experienced Crown Heights with all of my senses, and I'm totally worn out. Now I have to decompress and make Rosh Hashana.
And do lots of laundry.