Thursday, January 11, 2007
Today I got lost. In the spaghetti bowl. It's an intersection with all these crazy loops and ramps and roads going everywhere.
Anyway, I got scared and reached for my cell phone to call Yaakov. Nope - left it at home. I panicked. But then I thought; "Maven, you're a big girl. You can do this." And you know what? I did. I found my way out of the treacherous spaghetti bowl all by myself.
It made me wonder about my dynamic with Yaakov. I was always very independent. I navigated New York and San Francisco as a teenager, alone. Then I met Yaakov. I was 19. He was 26. He always came to my aid, no matter what. He watched out for me, fought my battles, protected me. In the beginning I really resisted this. But now, I cherish the role. I love being nurtured and protected. I love knowing that he's always there to save the day.
However...I'm realizing that I let him rescue me when I'm quite capable of handling things myself!