Wednesday, January 17, 2007
So today I went to the post office with my friend's son, Yaakov. I got on line behind 2 well dressed young men, and I noticed they had name tags. I knew right away: Mormons. On a mission.
I was filled with conflict. Extrovert-Maven wanted to chat them up. Anthropologist-Maven wanted to pepper them with questions (hey, what's with the special "Mormon underwear?"). Lubavitcher-Maven won: just shut up and stand on line.
But one of them turned to me. "Awww, what a cute kid! What's his name?" "Yaakov," I answered. He looked at me quizzically. "Yaakov?" "Yeah, same as Jacob." He continued, "Do you like living in Miami? We're from Vegas." "Oh yeah? My mother-in-law lives in Vegas." (When are they going to start the Mormon schtick?) "Where in Vegas?" "I have no idea." They started to talking to the lady in front of me. (Was it my Jew-vibe?)
The lady told them there was Mormon church near her. One guy said, "Yeah, we're everywhere," and started ticking off countries. When he said Israel, I wanted to whack him. They gave her a picture of Mr. J. Then they went to the postal worker and chatted her up, all charming and friendly. Was this all part of a sinister plan, to Mormonize America?
One post office at a time?