Wednesday, August 08, 2007
So today at camp carpool I rolled down the window to greet a friend of mine. "You're on the market to buy a house, aren't you?" she asked. "We're looking," I answered, wondering if she had a house in mind. "Did you see the house two doors down from Mrs. Stein? We just looked at it today." In my heart, I felt defensive. What's she doing looking at my house? Even though it's out of our price range, I still know where I'd put my furniture. I love that house.
I decided to kill this defensiveness immediately. I smiled at her. "We made an offer and were expecting a counter-offer, but she never came through. Good luck with it," I said. I thought of the Rebbe, who taught about correcting a flaw in the manner of chitzonius (outwardness). If you don't feel something inwardly, behave the proper way outwardly. The inside will eventually catch up. Fake it 'til you make it.
The whole drive home I thought about sincerity. I didn't feel sincere. But I wanted to. I wanted to feel that my friend should get the best house, even if it was the one I wanted. Plus, I really like her. A lot. I didn't want a sense of competitiveness between us.
I had the chance to see her again, tonight at a camp presentation. I was sitting right behind her. During a lull, I tapped her on the shoulder. "You know, there's a few things you should know about that block," I said, wanting to fill her in. We started to schmooze. "I didn't know you were interested in that house," she said. "We'll retract our offer if you want." "Chas v'shalom!" I answered, startled. "G-d has a house for you and a house for me, too. There's no need to do that." And at that moment, I really felt it. I felt aligned with my friend and with G-d.
She spoke about how she was worried about affording a house. I commiserated. I told her that she should have her husband get in touch with Yaakov - they could talk about the housing market together. Yaakov is very savvy about this stuff, I know he'd be able to help. It felt good getting my husband on board. It feels good to behave like a Jew.
Love, Maven @ 
3 Comments:
At 9:13 PM,
Anonymous said…
What a good lesson...Hashem has enough for each of us! Now it is just the patience that is so hard!
At 9:05 AM,
Mrs Andy said…
Just something to boost your faith about finding a house.
Four years ago we were looking for our first house and we were having a terrible time. Everytime we found something we liked it would go under contract the next day. We were so frustrated about this! After about 2 months of nothing we decided to just leave it and go on faith that when the right house came up we would find it.
Well that is excactly what happened! We were taking a drive of our town one weekend afternoon and we noticed a street with some houses for sale so we turned down it and saw our house. We took their flyier and called and went in and took a look. It was the house we'd wanted and waited for.
It also turned out the people who were selling were from our church, so we were able to have a very nice closing w/o fear of being ripped off.
You'll find your house, I know you will!
At 3:50 PM,
Wendy said…
You will find the perfect house. The house I wanted fell through and this one (the one we did buy) is more suited for us anyway. I think it happens all the time.
And yes, it feels good to be generous of spirit.
Post a Comment
<< Home