Tuesday, August 14, 2007
...A Lubavitcher yeshiva.
I was only planning on sending my 2 girls, and keeping Srulik at the local playgroup. But 2 days ago the playgroup teacher informed us she wasn't doing the 4 year old program. We decided to send him to the yeshiva. We looked at our numbers, and figured we could only afford X more. And when I say that, I mean we're taking money out of the grocery budget. So I called the school, and spoke to the money lady. She called me back, and agreed on the number.
First, let me tell you about yeshivas and money. They ask you a million questions, wanting to know about every penny earned and spent. I can't even deal with the money forms, too much anxiety. I make Yaakov do it. One friend described it as "taking your pants off for them." ("Oh, I see you're wearing briefs. Ten grand.")
Okay, I'm exaggerating. But that's basically it. You can hem and haw and haggle, beg and cry and plead. But somehow, some way, they're gonna get your money - and lots of it.
Now, I can't blame them. It costs a lot of money to run a school. But there's a yetzer hara I have that hates spending money like this on school. I resent it terribly. I hate that the rest of America can send their lovely kids to lovely public schools with lovely taxpayer money - a system we pay into but don't reap the benefits of.
I spoke to a mashpia before making the decision to send him, and she reminded me that G-d pays the bills. I'm glad to know somebody will.
Love, Maven @ 
18 Comments:
At 8:33 PM,
Ayelet Survivor said…
I understand your frustration about yeshiva tuition, but we do reap the benefits of free public education. We have to live with the children who go to those schools. If they don't get a good education so they can get decent jobs, they'll either end up on welfare or in prison -- and cost us LOTS more.
At 6:53 AM,
Anonymous said…
You are so new at this... welcome to the club. Imagine how you will feel when a $40,000 (or more) bill comes in for three or four kids. THIS is Jewish orthodox reality, I am sorry to say. So, next time you "want" to shop for something, decide if you really need it - you will need every cent to pay for your children's education!
At 7:06 AM,
Chaim said…
The U.S. Public School system is a mess. In every way possible. We are ranked among the lowest in Math and Science and the social scene that goes on at Public School is a moral nightmare. Yeshivas might cost way too much and many times not be so great, but it's worth it just to keep them out of that public cesspool.
At 9:31 AM,
Mrs Andy said…
So, next time you "want" to shop for something, decide if you really need it
I hardely think that food falls into this category. How judgemental "Anonymous", if you have read Maven's blog for any ammount of time, you will find that she and her husband are very committed to the education of their children, and take it very seriously, as they are serious about all aspects of their faith.
Sorry to get mad Maven, but honestly, if you're going to flame someone like you've been flamed, at least have the nerve to put your name to the comment!
At 9:46 AM,
Maven said…
eden - i didn't think i was getting flamed. i think anonymous was just giving me a "heads up."
by the way (a little late to say), but i liked your comment about finding your house. although come to think of it, it's apropos for this post. it's merely a variation on a theme: trusting G-d that He's gonna take care of it!
houses, tuition, same deal...it's all up to Him.
At 9:54 AM,
Mrs Andy said…
totally, we have to have faith...which seems to be a lesson that I have to learn over and over and over and over....!
At 10:52 AM,
Maven said…
eden - welcome to the club!
At 12:52 PM,
Anonymous said…
And this is why there needs to be a National Jewish Education Fund -- no Jewish family should have to put up with this year after year, with tuition bills dwarfing individual college tuitions in comparison.
And, also, IMO, every multi-million-dollar residential monstrosity (you know what I mean, it's more than just a "nice house") erected in every Jewish neighborhood on the planet testifies to someone's misplaced priorities somewhere.
Perhaps a 5% surcharge on esrogim. Maybe a 15% increase in the price of aliyos. There must be some way that the American Jewish community can subsidize its own future.
At 1:42 PM,
Anonymous said…
I wrote: So, next time you "want" to shop for something, decide if you really need it
I didn't get how this could be construed as flaming, unless some people are guilty of wanting needless items, buying them and subsequently not being able to afford tuition.....
I don't think FSAM falls into this catagory.
At 2:17 PM,
Maven said…
woo! it never fails to surprise me what gets you guys riled up. i think i write something blah and innocuous, and all sorts of comments come out of the woodwork.
chaim - sending my kids to public school is non-optional. but i'd love it if those vouchers i keep hearing about would happen already.
y-love - there *are* gemachs, gvirim, etc. that will help people out, if necessary. just to put that out there. but i totally agree, it's like doing college tuition year after year after year. better to spend money on jewish education than on medical bills, chas v'shalom.
as for the fancy schmancy houses, i hear what you're saying - but let me present another perspective: one of the chabad rebbes (i think the rashab) was very wealthy and lived in opulence. someone once said to him, "nu, how can the rebbe live richly like that?" and the rebbe answered, "who did G-d create all this gold and silver for? the yidden!" i guess the main thing is to elevate the money by doing good with it. maybe those houses are filled with lots of jewish children and lots of guests. who knows?
p.s. is it okay that every time i hear your name i think "special sauce?"
p.p.s. no surcharges on esrogim! they're already the most expensive lemons on the planet.
anonymous - you think too highly of me! i HAVE wanted needless items in the past and i HAVE purchased them. every harried mother needs to be a little self-indulgent now and again, right?
At 2:41 PM,
Anonymous said…
"Perhaps a 5% surcharge on esrogim"
Please. As if paying north of $100 for a LEMON isn't already enough of a ripoff. There are folks who make an entire years salary just by selling esrogim!
/not looking forward to Tishrei so much...it's too expensive... :(
At 3:36 PM,
Mrs Andy said…
You know Maven, I'm just here to give you some southwest spice. :)
At 4:26 PM,
Anonymous said…
ROFL at the "special sauce" reference. That's a different LOVE :)
But ok, maybe no one wants to pay 5% more for an esrog :)
There is no such thing as "Jewish orthodox reality" as being this set-in-stone thing that can never change as if it were l'Moshe mi'Sinai. The resources are extant, they need only be pooled and redirected.
Foundations come up with millions to send kids to Israel, but not a penny can be scraped together to send kids en masse to yeshiva. Yes, we do, Baruch Hashem, have gemachs and gvirim. But this -- Jewish education -- is definitely as much of a need as any other tzedakah cause (food aid such as Tomchei Shabbos, etc., excepted) and needs to be treated as such.
One should not have to be rich to receive Torah education.
At 6:02 PM,
Anonymous said…
One should not have to be rich to receive Torah education.
You don't have to be rich. You just have to be related to the right people. The administrators of th elocal yeshivos seem to do okay....if you catch my drift.
/not bitter
//really
At 7:37 PM,
Maven said…
y-love - ok, i hear you. you just want redirection and more accessibility.
*my* love (yaakov, that means YOU) - we both know esrogim are expensive and wish they were cheaper. but the idea that a yid can make a parnosa off them makes the whole thing BETTER, not worse!
as for the yeshiva administration having money, why can't they have money? how do we know where their money comes from? i don't think their relatives get "breaks," either.
/bitter you are, yes.
//still love you, i do.
At 7:44 PM,
Anonymous said…
Torah is what makes one rich...money is just a detail.
At 9:28 PM,
Dinosaur Mom said…
Well, for what it's worth, the director of religious education at my church says the single strongest selecting factor for whether kids grow up practicing their faith is how much they were exposed to it before the age of seven. Parochial education versus secular education didn't make a big difference. I respect your decision and the sacrifices you're making, I'm just saying.
At 12:31 PM,
Anonymous said…
But you don't want to send your kids to the schools that are paid for by the taxpayer money Maven, so you are being givin a choice, and making the choice.
B'H that we have the choice in this country.
I don't believe in the way the money is solicited, but nonetheless, not only do your kids get to go to a Yeshiva, but you have a choice of Yeshiva's. That's
the good part of America.
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